The Siroker Brothers

Shtatus Report

Growing up near Stanford, I imagined going to Berkeley would be a major shock. It wasn’t. My dorm looks and feels just like Dan’s was at Stanford. The campus is beautiful just like Stanford’s is. The people—peers, TAs, and professors—are all friendly and smart just as I imagine they are at Stanford. The current description of this site, “A blog by identical twins separated by rival universities,” might as well be “A blog by rival twins separated by identical universities.” The essential difference of course is that Berkeley’s homeless could kick Palo Alto’s homeless’ asses any day of the week (except maybe Tuesday).

So are Dan and I “rival twins”? Not really. We’re competitive certainly; I wouldn’t be the master Madden player I am today if not for our heated games. That competitive spirit is partially why I’ve invaded Dan’s blog—I must outdo him and his good wordings. I’m not entirely sure of the other reasons. I suppose it would be nice to have some recording of what I was thinking and doing at this point in my life to laugh at in the future. And who can pass up bragging about how much fun they’re having?

And fun I have been having. I’ve shopped for myself (a huge feat I assure you), gotten drunk a couple of times, survived the battleground that is San Francisco on the Forth of July, and played football entirely off my fat reserves.

Shopping

The backpack, wallet, and shoes I bought all by myself

I’ve had the pleasure of having to shop for myself now that I’m on my own. I’ve found that the accumulation of material goods is everything it’s cracked up to be. The giddy thrill of having a new plaything and knowing that you’ve increased your standard of living does not cease to amuse me. Dae-Ho said something along the lines of, “I’m always thinking of ways to spend money even when I don’t have any.” I understand that better now.

I've bought shoes, a wallet, a backpack, a new cell phone (my old one’s antenna broke badly), a copy of the MLA Handbook, a credit card (that came with a neat number: 5534 6222 1622 8513), flip-flops, sunglasses, and headphones for my laptop. Fortunately, I caught most of those things on sale or at an otherwise reduced price. I've never felt as independent as I do now. It’s almost like I’m an adult or something.

Drunken Super

Being drunk is enjoyable. I’ve always felt that way, but this summer I’m finding out just how enjoyable it is. They say ignorance is bliss; when I’m drunk there’s no question I’m ignorant—not ignorant in the racist sense, but in the I-can’t-walk-straight-or-form-coherent-sentences way. Fortunately, I haven’t gotten drunk to the point where I do really stupid things like drive or hit on other men. Yet.

Some people scoff at my inability to hold liquor, but I'm actually glad I can quickly and cheaply get drunk if I care to. I'm afraid to get drunk regularly though because I don’t want to build up my tolerance to alcohol. I also figure I’m due to throw up or get stuck with a hangover, neither of which has happened before.

I find it easier to get to know people when I’m drunk. Not because I’m more outgoing, but because people aren’t intimidated of me when I’m drunk, huddled on the floor, and insisting people stop touching my ears. Oftentimes it’s helpful to have an intimidating stature, but not when it scares away potential honeys.

The Fourth of July

Speaking of potential honeys, I saw absolutely none when a couple dorm friends and I went to San Francisco for the Fourth of July. I did however see a post-apocalyptic war zone. The majority of the night was quiet, peaceful, and enjoyable. We waited two hours to be seated at Daunte’s, a restaurant on Pier 39. The wait was worth it though—we got a great table (comfortably sitting nine) in an alcove surrounded by windows overlooking the bay. We saw fireworks from the restaurant.

I saw the real fireworks though walking back from Pier 39 to the BART station. People were throwing small gunpowder bags against the pavement and lighting sparklers just over the crowd that was walking home from the festivities. At first I’d jump a little whenever a loud noise would shock me, but I eventually became desensitized to it. I was not prepared however for what I can only describe as the explosion of a small bomb. This “firework” set off car alarms along a whole city block.

I was reminded of something Apu said about the Fourth of July: “Celebrate the birth of your nation by blowing up a small piece of it.” Oftentimes the traditions we carry on and embrace are at best silly, and at worst, destructive. Fireworks sure make the sky perty though.

Football

A perty sky is what I was seeing when I was laying on my back on the grass, completely exhausted from playing football. Nathan introduced me to his weekly football game. We played at 5 PM on a Saturday a couple weeks ago on what Nathan calls Hearst Field (but is really named North Field). Having exerted myself the night before (I wonder doing what), I woke up at around 3 PM. I decided to forgo eating before playing football.

Hence the extreme fatigue. One might also be inclined to blame the fatigue on the low-carbohydrate diet I’m subjecting myself to. The diet is based on the South Beach diet, which I later realized was very similar to the highly-criticized Atkin’s diet. Don’t ask me what you’re supposed to do for either diet; I don’t really know. I’m doing the Eric diet. And it’s working.

At my heaviest, I was 270 pounds. Before I came to Berkeley, I was around 230 pounds. After I completely exerted all the energy I had in playing football, I was 208 pounds. Tomorrow morning I expect to have reached my goal of 200 pounds. The combination of avoiding carbohydrates and working out regularly is slowly sculpting the drought and famine resistant frame I once enjoyed. As someone supportively told me of my diet, “Manorexia is in.”

Conclusion

I’m having a really good time in Berkeley. I plan to document and thereby moderate the good times I’m having with this blog. I may throw in some interesting thoughts I have or share details on projects I’m working on in the meantime, but I’ll try to keep my posts palatable to all audiences.

Before I finish I want to apologize to my brother and everyone else who was eagerly awaiting my first post. A combination of technical problems, laziness, debilitating perfectionism, and a busy schedule postponed this post far too long. I expect future posts to come quicker and with more regularity. Your gentle encouragement and support should facilitate that.